by Blender Dumbass

Aka: J.Y. Amihud. A Jewish by blood, multifaceted artist with experience in film-making, visual effects, programming, game development, music and more. A philosopher at heart. An activist for freedom and privacy. Anti-Paternalist. A user of Libre Software. Speaking at least 3 human languages. The writer and director of the 2023 film "Moria's Race" and the lead developer of it's game sequel "Dani's Race".

In comments under the previous article, people asked me to try writing dialogue in a more play-like style. I will keep the prose normal, but will do dialogues differently this time. Tell me if it was the right decision.

Also about the Moria's Race Livestreams. I have stopped streaming. But it doesn't mean that I have stopped working on the movie. People expressed to me the reason they avoid the streams. And the reason was that they didn't want any spoilers. Well. Okay then. I will work on it silently. And one day I will just release it. Hopefully by the next trailer I will have a release date ready.

It was one of those days when Mr. Humbert invited Sheiny and Chloe to watch a random movie in his dirty cinema. They avoided films shot in 16:9 aspect ratio since, well, Mr. Humbert's screen was an ultra-wide, curved CinemaScope. 16:9 films looked rather strange on this screen. But it seems like, this time, they were bored of the ultra-wide movies.

They had a habit of picking a movie at random. That day Sheiny wanted to choose one herself. Mr. Humbert showed her the drawer of film reels. And asked her to choose one. She inserted her hand into the drawer of 16:9 movies, without looking. She knew that she is choosing a 16:9 film. Everybody agreed on it already. She took out her hand grabbing a 35 mm print of "Call Me By Your Name" directed by Luca Guadagnino. There was no poster, no trailer. Just a name and a director's name written with a marker on the casing of the film.

Sheiny: Call me by your name? I heard something like this. The title sounds familiar.

Mr. Humbert: Oh... I think you girls will love this one.

Chloe: What's it about?

Mr. Humbert: Isn't it the whole point, to not know?

Sheiny shrugged and walked over to the projector, looking for an easy way to insert the film cartridge.

Mr. Humbert: What are you doing?

Sheiny: Trying to understand how to put it in.

Mr. Humbert: Wait... Go to the shelf again.

Sheiny looked at Mr. Humbert surprised.

Mr. Humbert: Go...

Sheiny went to the shelf.

Mr. Humbert: Take the next film reel from one you took.

Sheiny did that and read the mark on it. It also said "Call Me By Your Name" and also was directed by Luca Guadagnino.

Sheiny: Why do you need two of them?

Mr. Humbert: I have six.

Sheiny: Why do you need six of them? ... Oh... Wait. No...

Mr. Humbert: The one you took was the third piece.

Sheiny: Wait. But you only have 3 projectors.

Mr. Humbert: Well. I only have 2 film projectors.

Sheiny: So you need to change to the third from the first while the second is running?

Mr. Humbert thought about what she said, since her analytical approach to thinking it all through, slightly confused him. But still nodded in approval. The thing she just discovered was that film which is projected from real physical film is not stored as one large reel. But rather as many small ones each around 20 minutes at length. So each time another 20 minutes passes, one projector gets shut off and the other projector picks up from that same moment, from a different film reel. Hopefully without the audience noticing the switch. And so because the first projector doesn't do anything anymore, the projectionist has time to load it up with the next piece of film, to do the switch again, in yet another 20 minutes.

Sheiny: Damn!... Well I guess I will leave you to it. Hm... Strange. I never noticed a missing frame or anything.

Mr. Humbert: There is a second of error time.

Sheiny: Wait. There are duplicate frames on those reels?

Mr. Humbert: Yes. And I can switch during any of those frames.

Sheiny: Oh... And you put a timer on a phone or something.

Sheiny thought that maybe she could argue with him to use something better than a proprietary timer app on the phone.

Mr. Humbert: There are marks on the film itself. You know those burned frames once in a while? Like a black circle that appears at the top-right corner?

Sheiny opened her mouth wide. Chloe, that I should remind you was present in the room, was fascinated with that Mr. Humbert found some information that Sheiny didn't know yet about. Anyway they put the movie in. And the girls went to see the film in the cinema. While Mr. Humbert stayed to change film reels in the projectionist room.

They watched a lot of action films and huge drama movies while visiting Mr. Humbert like this. Most of them were digitally projected using the third projector. But this time the movie was simplistic and strangely minimal. All of the action happened in one small town and forest around it. There were no big set-pieces. The most epic shot of the film was perhaps a waterfall which was just a location to which you could walk up normally and shoot. But this didn't make the movie worse. Somehow the movie was amazing despite it's being entirely driven by actors.

Something that Sheiny noticed a lot, while Chloe didn't notice much, was the amount of details put into the decorations of the house itself. The interior design. The various table scenes all happening in different places. She felt rather envious of this. She wanted to live in those places. But her own house was nowhere near this good looking.

Chloe noticed something Sheiny didn't. Chloe thought a lot about the main character's ability to play musical instruments. And how much actual work there should have been as a performer to do all these things. He plays guitar. He draws notes. He plays piano... in an uncut long take... where you can see the entire keyboard... and his face... in three different styles... while making jokes about styles... This was something unbelievable to her.

The last 20 or so minutes Mr. Humbert was sitting with them in the cinema itself. And when the credits started rolling, he ran to the projectionist room to shut the movie. And then went back. They had a small ritual of talking about the films after watching them. Sheiny started.

Sheiny: Wow. I never thought a gay movie could be so good.

Chloe: At first I thought it was boring. But then the sex started.

Sheiny: Oh my god.

Mr. Humbert: Why, don't be ashamed. The movie is about not being ashamed.

Chloe: Right!

Sheiny thought about it a bit longer before talking.

Sheiny: I think the movie is about something else?

Chloe: About love?

Mr. Humbert: What is it about?

Sheiny: It's about childhood trauma.

Mr. Humbert frowned.

Mr. Humbert: Oh... Why so dark? The movie is pure joy.

Chloe: What?

Sheiny: No, no... Hear me out. Remember the peach scene?

Chloe: Woa, that was fucking weird. Even I wouldn't fuck a fruit.

Sheiny: Yeah, but what does it symbolize?

Both Mr. Humbert and Chloe thought about it.

Chloe: An asshole?

Sheiny: What?

Chloe: The peach looked like an anus.

Mr. Humbert: Maybe something to do with fertility? He took out the seed and then he put his own seed in there.

Sheiny: Fertility in a movie about gays? None of them can get pregnant.

Mr. Humbert: No... I mean... Yeah, well, that's kind of the point. He throws away the seed. As he thrown away that young girl earlier. And remember, they had an intimate moment in the same room.

Chloe: They had sex!

Mr. Humbert: Yeah...

Chloe: You said "intimate moment" while earlier you said to not be ashamed. They had sex!

Sheiny: You have to look at it more broadly. When Oliver comes then and discovers the fruit. What's his name? Ah... Elliot. He cries. Also. If I remember correctly. Elliot is 17. Which is a weird choice. And perhaps very deliberate on the part of the writers.

Mr. Humbert: It's Ellio without the T. It's a French thing.

Sheiny: So what I'm thinking is that he got traumatized to the point he fucks a fruit. And he doesn't like it about himself. I remember there was a scene where the other guy, Oliver told him something like "I hope I didn't fuck you up". Well it seems like he did. The guy fucked a fruit.

Mr. Humbert thought about it.

Mr. Humbert: But that's not how trauma works? Isn't it? If he was truly traumatized he should hate fucking. Not like it. But he likes it to the point that he fucks a peach.

Chloe: What's wrong with fucking a peach?

Sheiny: Exactly. What I'm trying to say, he doesn't like that he fucks a peach. Like he is ashamed of needing sex so much that he uses a fruit for it.

Chloe: What's wrong with fucking a peach?

Mr Humbert: I think I see your point, Sheiny. But it's not trauma your are describing. It's addiction.

Sheiny thought about it. Mr. Humbert made an excellent point. And she just had to put it through her brain. Addiction! Not trauma! Addiction! Something that's perhaps worse than trauma in some way, she thought.

Sheiny: What's wrong with fucking a peach? Technically nothing. But in this particular scene there was something off-putting. Perhaps, you are right, Mr. Humbert, an addiction.

Mr. Humbert: So the movie is about not caring too much what people say and embracing who you are. He cries since the world will not understand him fucking a fruit?

Sheiny: No he cries since he just found out that he lost control over himself.

Mr. Humbert: Yeah but why? Like does it matter? If he wants to fuck a peach, why not fuck a peach? You are the one that promotes freedom here, Sheiny.

Sheiny: But he doesn't want to fuck a peach.

Chloe: What? He clearly wants to fuck a peach.

Mr. Humbert: Yes. He... wait.

Chloe: What?

Mr. Humbert: I think she is right. He doesn't want to fuck a peach.

Chloe: But nobody forced him to do it. He did it himself.

Mr. Humbert: That's why this scene is so brilliant.

Sheiny: He doesn't want to fuck the peach, but he does it anyway, since he is addicted to fucking assholes way too much.

Chloe: See? Peach does look like an asshole.

Mr. Humbert: Well, but that's scary. What if somebody is addicted to say, alcohol. Should we ban alcohol? Last time it didn't work.

Sheiny: Shit!

Mr. Humbert still looked at Sheiny as if she will any moment answer the question about alcohol that he just asked her. But she did something else.

Sheiny: Chloe?

Chloe: Yes?

Sheiny: Are you traumatized?

Chloe: What?

Sheiny: I mean, I'm sorry, are you addicted to sex?

Chloe: I love it a lot.

Sheiny: Yeah, but are you addicted to it?

Chloe thought about it. She didn't ever seem to ask herself this question before. Meanwhile she thought about it, Mr Humbert found something either clever or stupid to say.

Mr. Humbert: I'm addicted to food. Isn't sex like a biological necessity?

Sheiny: With a fruit?

Mr. Humbert thought about it, rather awkwardly.

Sheiny: I'm not saying that you should not have a freedom to fuck a fruit. But is it really a biological necessity? I don't see how you can make an argument of fucking a fruit by using biology. I think the only argument you can make in this case is freedom.

Mr. Humbert: Well, but how about the fact that you need to cum every once in a while?

Sheiny: Do you?

Mr. Humbert: Hm...

Chloe: So wait? Am I addicted to sex?

Sheiny: Yeah, well, I think so.

Chloe: But is it bad?

Mr. Humbert: Like, yeah, it's perhaps the least harmful addiction out there.

Sheiny: Well. There is a fundamental problem with any addiction. Like, I'm not saying that I'm not addicted. I think now... It seems like in life, there are only two possibilities, it turns out, either you are traumatized by it, or addicted to it. With the first one you will have a very hard time thinking about it or having it. But it seems like the other one is more popular.

Mr. Humbert: Yes, the psycho-tards social workers put both types under one umbrella though. That makes for 100% of people on earth traumatized.

Sheiny: What are you talking about?

Mr. Humbert: We here made a business out of a legislation that made what you do illegal. Right?

Just to clarify to the readers of this article, the characters of Sheiny, Chloe and Mr. Humbert are from my book Sheiny The Hacker. The book is about two little girls ( Sheiny and Chloe ) that using a black-market connection ( Mr. Humbert ) sell illegal pornography that they themselves produce. I guess you can now, re-read the article to get the most cringe out of it, knowing that the two girls are 9 year olds.

Mr. Humbert: If this was not illegal, we could not possibly charge the amount we charge for a copy. So the whole business requires it to stay illegal. But on the other hand, this is a kind of hypocrisy from our side. We don't believe that it's wrong to do what we do, but we have to keep it wrong enough in the public's eye, for it to be profitable to us. Right?

Sheiny: Well if the regulations regarding child labor were a bit less strict, I don't think I would have done what I do, to be honest.

Chloe: I would.

Sheiny: That's because you're addicted.

Mr. Humbert: Yeah, w-well... about this addicted thing. One way to keep it illegal is to keep telling the public that no matter what deviation in behavior happens, it's trauma. From one side, you have people who are really hurt by it, so they cannot think of sex. Or it's very hard for them to have intimate relationships. This is what I would call trauma myself. But addictions? Such as of Chloe here, we call it trauma as well. Since both are a deviation from the norm. But I don't personally believe that it's trauma.

Sheiny: Well here is a thing, though. Addictions take freedom also. Like, what's the whole point of making rape illegal in the first place?

Chloe: Yeah, like why?

Sheiny: Chloe, you are stupid! You know that? ... The point is. Rape is a physical stripping of freedom. One person doesn't want to do something. And the other person forces that person to do it. It is not about sex, per se, but about force. About power. Now, if we look at trauma, the way you describe trauma, the post traumatic stress disorder thing. Let's assume that it's possible that this person will want to have sex later in life. Say, they find a person they love. And they truly want to have sex. Then, the trauma stops them from doing it, since they remember something and they get frightened by it. Which means that technically freedom to have sex is taken away from them.

Chloe: This is terrible!

Sheiny: Yes it is. But then, say you have an addiction instead? You was perverted enough to the point where even if you don't want to have sex, the addiction forces you to do it anyway. Similarly to how drug addicts do not want, really, to take drugs. This is also freedom taken away. This time freedom not to have sex.

Mr. Humbert: I think I know what you are talking about. It's like when I'm trying to concentrate on something, like a paperwork. And I just can't stop jerking off to porn. Wasting all my time. Sometimes I catch myself on a thought that I rather want to get castrated to be able to think about important things.

Sheiny: That's interesting.

Chloe: I know that. My mom was telling me to do homework. And I was chatting with dudes instead. And I was getting bad grades because of it. Now Sheiny does my homework.

Mr. Humbert: But what are you saying here? Not to have sex? I mean... there are only two variables here. Either you hated it so much that you are traumatized. Or you liked it so much that you are addicted. Isn't the second one the better option?

Sheiny: That's true. But maybe there is a third option. An option requiring a sort of self-discipline.

Mr. Humbert: But that's not freedom.

Sheiny: Well. It depends. If your current desire is to have a ludicrous sex adventure. Discipline works against you here. But what if your desire is to do important paper work? Then the addiction is what takes your freedom away.

Chloe: I choose a ludicrous sex adventure.

Sheiny: I know you do.

Mr. Humbert: Maybe there is a way to switch between the two states of mind at will.

Sheiny: If you find how to do it. Please tell me. I want to know.

Chloe: Are you also addicted?

Sheiny: Well. I'm not traumatized. It leaves only one option. Doesn't it? ... In whole seriousness though, I need that kind of technique to teach Chloe. I had enough of making her homework.

Mr. Humbert: Perhaps meditation.

Sheiny: Perhaps.

Mr. Humbert: But wait. The father had a different take on it in the end.

Sheiny: What?

Mr. Humbert: In the movie. The father, in the end. He was very much pro-perversion of any kind as long as this is how his son is.

Chloe: I'd like a dad like this.

Sheiny: I think the movie is not answering any question. It's just exploring a bunch of interesting ideas. And the ending was an exploration of a "What if the father was pro-gays?" or something. But that peach scene. With all it's cringe and stupidity. Well... That turned out to be extremely profound.

Happy Hacking!

















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