Spy Kids Armageddon

Blender Dumbass
👁 450

I did not expect Spy Kids Armageddon to be any good. It is written and directed by Robert Rodriguez. A guy who doesn't care about quality that much. His view on film-making was shaped by his first filming experience in 1992 when he made El Mariachi. A movie so cheap that it was weird to a lot of people that it was an action film. Rodriguez has this idea that he can cheat his way into making anything at all. Using as he says "creativity instead of money". So most of his movies tend to look like the Star Wars prequels. A lot of pretty noticeable green screen. Tons of CGI where most other people would use practical props. And strange camera work which is probably more dictated by the limitations of his methods, and not by actual directorial decisions.

Ballerina 2025 did what Spy Kids should have but couldn't

Blender Dumbass
👁 8 💬 2

When I reviewed Havoc I wrote about this strange feeling that I dubbed "short orgasmic blackout" when I see a stupidly serious, angry face of a female character that is really cute. And one of the most cutest actors living these days is fucking Ana de Armas. Let me illustrate. We see young Victoria Comte playing Eve ( the main character ) while being 11 ( Comte was born in 2013, do the math ), and then the film says "12 years later" so now she is 23. Yet de Armas playing her is 36 ( at the time of filming ). She plays somebody almost half her age and it works. Why? She is fucking cute! That's why. And because of that I knew I was probably getting the "short orgasmic blackout" the movie.

#balerina #johnwick #anadearmas #movies #film #review #cinemastodon #action #cinema

Riddle Of Fire

Blender Dumbass
👁 57

There is a sub genre of film which includes my movie Moria's Race and things like Spy Kids. Those are movies where child characters are opposing adults. And winning them. But there is a kind of spectrum in this sub genre. Spy Kids franchise, for example, is very clean and sterile. Trying as hard as possible to get a good age rating. While others might get a bit riskier. Riddle Of Fire is one such film.

Machete 2010 is about US politics of 2025 somehow

Blender Dumbass
👁 15 💬 1

An exploitation film is a film that exploits some talked about fear or trend in culture in order to sell tickets to a movie that is probably not very good. Exploitation films are usually low budget, badly made B-movies, with a certain charm to them, if you like Tommy Wiseau's work. 2010's Robert Rodriguez film Machete is, somewhat of an intentional attempt at recreating the exploitation film phenomenon. Which exploits US politics of 2025, somehow. ( Rodriguez must have a time machine somewhere in his studio ).

#Machete #RobertRodriguez #film #review #movies #cinemastodon #trump #uspol #kirk #ice

Economy is fake, marketing is gay, I'm Not Even Human teaser is lame

Troler
👁 6 ❤ 1 💬 4

Putting characters from the film in a world they do not belong to leads to jarring results. I'm not even human is a stupidly blatant propaganda piece. As such, there is this expectation for the film to not take itself seriously, since if one does, the film is less enjoyable. That's why a teaser for the movie being only slightly serious is jarring: https://odysee.com/@BlenderDumbass:c/interview-with-characters-from-i-m-not:a

#DominykastheHorsesJourneytotheStars #BlenderDumbass #ImNotEvenHuman #Marketing #Advertisement #review

Machete Kills 2013 is trying to beat Spaceballs

Blender Dumbass
👁 8 💬 1

As I observed 2 hours ago in my review of Machete, the first film is about US politics of 2025. The second movie Machete Kills is something else entirely. If the first film is a semi-parody of exploitation films. This one is a full on spoof comedy, parodying not just exploitation films, but other things too. By the end of the film, the bullshit is so absurd, that you cannot stop laughing. And then Elon Musk appears out of nowhere to send Machete into space.

#MacheteKills #RobertRodriguez #film #review #movies #cinemastodon

Is Idiocracy 2006 intentionally stupid?

Blender Dumbass
👁 4 ❤ 2 💬 2

We all know about absolute cinematic masterpieces like The Room by the legendary Tommy Wiseau. Films that were intended to be great works of cinema, but that failed so miserably at achieving their goal, that they spawn all the way around the scale and became great works of cinema, by mistake, anyway. But then there are films like The Grindhouse movies, or Black Dynamite, or Wiseau's sequel to Samurai Cop, who's goal was to be those intentionally terrible pieces of crap, from the get go. Is Idiocracy by Mike Judge from the first type of terrible movies, or from the second, intentional one? Is Idiocracy intentionally stupid?

#idiocracy #film #review #movies #cinemastodon

The Psycho-Sexual analysis of Blender Dumbass

Blender Dumbass
🔐 3 👁 50 ❤ 5 🔄 2 💬 5

110

People change. People change! People grow. People adopt. People change their minds about things. People learn new things everyday. People form opinions. People change. And so have I. I notice something rather strange about people that come into contact with me without prior knowledge of what I do and how I think. I remember the other day on mastodon being bombarded with hate for seemingly no reason what so ever. I either said something good about Richard Stallman, or said something slightly too vague about one thing or another. I know I held opinions that I'm not proud of today. I know I probably have opinions right now that I will change in the future. People change.

Therefor I decided that it would be a good idea, both for the sake of my mental health and just as an example of said change, to talk to you about myself. To psycho-sexually analyze what I stand for. What I believe in. And most importantly: how I got to this point. How I changed to be where I am today. Yet, in a strange kind of way I am slightly afraid of strangers when it comes to my psychology. It is my private life, after all. And I don't want to reveal everybody everything about me. The good, the bad and the ugly. And then the ugly, the bad and the good. I don't want to give haters the platform to hate. So I suppose this is the perfect excuse to use the fediverse gimmick I came up with, the other day. Basically you have to be at least somewhat of a fan of me and / or my work, in order for me to feel okay with sharing with you all this private, highly emotional, stuff. Don't worry about it. If you are a fan, this is going to be a piece of cake for you. The website will just check that you are, and everything is going to be okay. For everybody else, perhaps, this article isn't for you.

#biography #psychology #philosophy #story #sexuality #love #gnu #linux #computers #blender3d

Snake Eyes 1998 is De Palma's attempt at restoring his Hitch spirit

Blender Dumbass
👁 14 💬 2

Watching the opening scene of Brian De Palma's 1998 film Snake Eyes makes you realize that this motherfucker is trying very hard. We have 13 minutes of Nicolas Cage running around a very crowded set. The scene is clever with its camera, giving us multiple layers of exposition in the same time. Like there could be a TV on the foreground and Cage on the background. And they seem unrelated at first, but the scene establishes most of it's plot details right in this very shot. And then the shot ends ( 13 minutes later ) at the exact moment, the script drops the "inciting incident". De Palma is really trying hard to direct the shit out this movie.

#SnakeEyes #BrianDePalma #NicolasCage #film #review #movies #cinemastodon

The Green Inferno 2013 is Eli Roth's version of Avatar

Blender Dumbass
👁 43 💬 2

In James Cameron's Avatar humans are attacking the forests of Pandora, bulldozing and killing indigenous population of the planet, to get to the natural resources their tribes are sitting at. The military is literally playing a role of guards, for the bulldozers, because the indigenous have become sort of very upset with humans, that terrorize their land. This is sort the plot of Eli Roth's horror film The Green Inferno, just Roth makes it way way more viscerally.

#TheGreenInferno #EliRoth #activism #film #reivew #movies #cinemastodon

Flight Risk 2025 is Mel Gibson failing to be Robert Rodriguez

Blender Dumbass
👁 5

The first shot of the 2025 thriller directed by Mel Gibson called Flight Risk is an establishing shot of a location you might see on television, which already says a lot about the movie. But that's not all of it. The shot is also very much computer-generated. I wouldn't say it's Ai ( but anything's possible ). It looks more like a 2D composition using various elements. A modern matte-painting of sorts. It's hard to point out specifically what's wrong with it, but it looks obviously fake. And obviously put together on a computer. And then the rest of the film doesn't really shake off this fakeness.

#flightrisk #melgibson #markwahlberg #film #review #movies #cinemastodon

Ready Player One is about Privacy, Digital Rights and Ageism

Blender Dumbass
👁 24

A lot of people have a mixed bag of feelings when it comes to Steven Spielberg's 2018 masterpiece Ready Player One. They dislike the nostalgia bait, and the countless references. They poke fun at logical inconsistencies. Yet nobody can deny the fact that Spielberg apparently is incapable of making a terrible movie. Still, how many of you actually looked at Ready Player One seriously? How many of you thought about it's messaging? How many noticed the politics that Spielberg is hiding in plain sight?

#readyplayerone #stevenspielberg #film #review #movies #cinemastodon #privacy #digitalrights #eff #fsf #richardstallman #ageism

Speed Racer

Blender Dumbass
👁 44

This had to be done finally! One of the biggest inspirations for Moria's Race, one of my favorite childhood movies, one of the best action films ever and perhaps one of the most colorful films: Speed Racer by the Wachowskis.