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[icon reviews]Megalopolis: The high-brow bullshit I enjoy

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 38 💬 0



There is a kind of very difficult film-style that is extremely complicated to do right, a kind of metaphorical, retro-futuristic, allegorically emotiono-political noir. I've seen many types of this done in such a surface level insane way that they are borderline unwatchable. A good example of this type of movie, which works to some extend, is Blender Foundation's Elephants Dream. But even that is so strange that you have to grind yourself through a strange feeling of something being not quite right when watching it. Megalopolis by Francis Ford Coppola seems like one that actually works. Which I consider to be a big achievement in cinematic science.


[icon reviews]The Substance Will Make You Puke While Cumming

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 60 💬 0



I am still unsure whether Coralie Fargeat meant for The Substance to be taken seriously or not. There was a similar misunderstanding when it comes to Lars Von Trier's The House That Jack Built, where the audience were laughing, unable to comprehend in the intensity of the film, while the director was dead serious. The experience I had watching The Substance reminded me of this confusion. The film is so over the top, it beats the absurdity of Sam Raimi's horror-comedies.



[icon reviews]Ada & Zangemann The Movie: Could Be So Much Better!

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 23 💬 0



I got excited when a few month's ago they announced that Ada & Zangemann was going to be made into an animation film. I did not expect them to deliver so fast!


[icon reviews]Showgirls: The Porno-Cinematic Masterpiece

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 67 💬 0



Paul Verhoeven is to some extend a legendary film-maker. RoboCop, Total Recall, Starship Troopers, Hoolow Man. Movies you have probably seen and seen again. Yet it seems like his movie Showgirls perhaps was made with a miscalculation on his part.


[icon reviews]Challengers: Not Really About Tennis!

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 71 💬 0



I was skeptical of Luca Guadagnino's films like Call Me By Your Name until I saw them. It felt like Luca is making high brow dramas that are designed solely as tear-squeezers that appeal to contemporary politics. But then I saw his movies. From Call Me By Your Name to instant horror classics like Bones And All he proved time and time again that he is truly great. His movies are insanely visceral emotional roller-coasters that are not afraid to be sincere, while every other movie these days cannot take anything seriously. But then came a trailer of Luca Guadagnino making a movie about Tennis.


[icon reviews]Riddle Of Fire

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 40 💬 0



There is a sub genre of film which includes my movie Moria's Race and things like Spy Kids. Those are movies where child characters are opposing adults. And winning them. But there is a kind of spectrum in this sub genre. Spy Kids franchise, for example, is very clean and sterile. Trying as hard as possible to get a good age rating. While others might get a bit riskier. Riddle Of Fire is one such film.


[icon reviews]Super 8

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 34 💬 0



People accuse me of many bad things for making a movie where kids go against their parents into dangerous situations. Apparently they never seen Super 8. One criticism I hear often about Super 8 is that the kids in this film are way too brave! No wonder Steven Spielberg is attached to this project. He made and produced a fair share of anti-ageism films in his career.


[icon reviews]Speed Racer

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 29 💬 0



This had to be done finally! One of the biggest inspirations for Moria's Race, one of my favorite childhood movies, one of the best action films ever and perhaps one of the most colorful films: Speed Racer by the Wachowskis.


[icon reviews]Only God Forgives

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 49 💬 0



From my review of Drive you probably know that I like the taste of Nicolas Winding Refn's cock. And in this review I will be sucking his cock once again, while drooping saliva all of his masterpiece Only God Forgives.


[icon reviews]Barbie

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 41 💬 0



I was not sure if I wanted to see Barbie. I certainly didn't want to see it together with Oppenheimer. But the funny thing is, I still didn't review Oppenheimer, while here I am reviewing Barbie. I think I have the same reason here as with Nope as of why I avoided it. You know Nope was directed by a black man. And it was one of its main selling points. Barbie is directed by a woman. And everybody is talking about it. And it feels forced to watch a movie for that kind of reason. So I avoided Barbie until now. But since I had a Ryan Gosling marathon, I though that I might as well get into this film. And oh my god. I have thoughts!


[icon reviews]Lars and the Real Girl

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 37 💬 0



It was very nice to have a marathon of Ryan Gosling movies, because I stumbled upon this unique masterpiece. Lars and the Real Girl is a story about a sad relationship. About a man named Lars and his girl named Bianca who is sick and getting worse and worse with every passing day. The twist is, Bianca is actually a live sized sex doll.


[icon reviews]Crazy Stupid Love

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 45 💬 0



I decided to give myself somewhat of a Ryan Gosling marathon, after re-watching Drive the other day. I gave myself a challenge though. I didn't want to watch the stuff I already like. I didn't want "Only God Forgives" ( which I will review soon ). I didn't want "Blade Runner 2049". I wanted something else. Something that I personally would not select normally. And therefor I put Crazy, Stupid, Love.


[icon reviews]The Breakfast Club

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 31 💬 0



Imagine a situation when you have to go to school on a weekend to basically waste your morning there. Imagine that somebody wanted to make a movie about it. It would be the worst kind of movie idea imaginable. How could you even make that interesting? Well John Hughes did. The movie should not work under any circumstance, but it does. And it does so well, it's a bloody cinematic miracle.


[icon reviews]Drive

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 49 💬 0



It is very strange to me that this is the first time I review anything by Nicolas Winding Refn here. I love this director and his style a lot. The movie Drive is perhaps the best introduction to him that you could ever get. It is his fastest paced movie ( apart from maybe Bronson ). He likes to be very slow. Drive is paced more or less like a normal film. That is why, if you want to start getting yourself into Nicolas Winging Refn I would recommend starting from Drive.


[icon reviews]What Lies Beneath

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 33 💬 0



Have you ever wondered what would Alfred Hitchcock do in the age of CGI and VFX? What kind of strange insane shorts he would come up with? Well Robert Zemeckis set out for himself a challenge to find out. He is notorious for using visual effects creatively. A lot of people might be familiar with the mirror shot he did in the film Contact. So something like trying to make a Hitchcockian thriller of the 21st century was just about the right kind of thing for Zemeckis.


[icon reviews]Call Me By Your Name

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[avatar]  Blender Dumbass

👁 66 💬 0



Being a fan of mostly action cinema, and plot heavy thrillers makes it feel as if Call Me By Your Name has no plot what so ever. But it is a mistake. Luca Guadagnino is a kind of director that tends to film very subtle movies. But if you are paying attention and you are invested in the characters themselves, those movies tend to have very strong effects. This is why I love Call Me By Your Name so much. It is as if I went on a vacation to Italy myself and spent my time with the characters of this movie. As if I had become their friend. And as if I myself got invested in their day to day little struggles.



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